Why Does God Care What Happens Between the Sheets?

Alright guys, I said the next one would be about dating… here it is. Let me first say that much of this post is not original (i.e.: I am copying someone).

The Fundamental Question: Why should God care what happens between the sheets?

Historically Christians are known to be arrogant, judgmental and condemning of people outside of the church on these issues. How do we avoid these pitfalls while staying pure and true to our relationship with Christ? We do not want to be guilty of moralizing but how do we avoid this?

The reality is, every human conversation is moral at its core. We cannot operate or think without a moral template, thus we are created in and exist in a moral universe. This is the foundation for what I am about to lay out.

Analogy time: Just a short while ago it turned out that baby spinach was found to contain e-coli. So the powers that be have to make a decision – either pull the plug on spinach or let people get hurt and die because of the mere potential that the spinach contains e-coli. This is a moral decision. They have to weigh the consequences. Either let people get sick and possibly die OR hurt someone’s economy, their livelihood, their income. They could have just said that it’s just the potential that someone gets sick and just the potential that someone might die. This is a moral choice. They are saying it is better for you and better for society that you be safe. This limits our lives, doesn’t it?

Now, picture, God created everything good in relationship to one another. In Genesis, Ch1 God called all that He created good. He uses the term “good” seven times in Ch1. When He created the cosmos, He said it was good. With every movement He said it was good, it was good, it was good, it was good, it was good. But when He created humanity, he said it was “very good.” He didn’t say it worked, or it was functional or it was done. He said it was good because the universe is created in an act of goodness from God. What is amazing is that the universe itself gives a picture of the unifying theme that everything God creates and that theme is relationship.

The universe is a declaration of relationship. Everything relates just perfectly: the moon, the sun, the stars, the cosmos, the composition of the air; the movement of the earth. If anything moves just slightly it is all gone. We are all gone. This is the grand relationship. The way the universe relates seems to hold one thing in balance – this little planet we know as earth, so it is in the perfect place so that it can create life. So when God creates the universe, it is a declaration that the unifying theme of ALL creation is relationship.

He created human beings in perfect relationship; male and female He created them. He told them to be “fruitful and multiply.” This is a very nice Bible’s way of saying have sex. He gave us permission but in the context of community, intimacy & relationship & commitment. And in that context, He says it is very good; this is the perfect picture of who I am as God; this kind of intimacy and connectedness and communion in relationship.

By the way, Genesis Ch1 uses the word “good” seven times, Genesis Ch2 uses the word “good” five times, and Gen3 uses the word “good” three times and by Gen4 the word “good” is gone. For the next ten chapters, it never even describes anything.

For us to engage in conversation about why God should care about our morality, our sexual activity we have to understand that the backdrop to all creation is that we exist in a moral universe. That God creates everything in a proper relationship to itself and everything around it. It is no different for us as human beings. God created us and we were very good. We were an expression of His character and His essence. The God that is the relational God. The God that is love.

In Genesis Ch4 when the word “good” disappeared, realize it comes out of a relationship. Adam and Eve had two kids – Cain & Abel. Now, the context is important. Abel and Cain bring an offering to God in a moment of worship to God. Abel connects to God in a way God invited him too but Cain does not because now there is a proper process of relationship. You know why? Because when Adam and Eve severed their relationship with God, they severed their relationship with each other. They never knew there was an interconnected ness between their relationship, their communion with God and their relationship and their communion with each other. But the moment they severed their relationship with God, they were naked and ashamed. When God came walking in the garden, in the cool of the day, they hid. They were not just hiding from God, they were hiding from each other.

So now with Abel and Cain, they come to God with offerings and it wasn’t that God was mysterious and confusing. In fact in a conversation with Abel, He embraces his offering. With Cain, He says, “Cain if you do what is right, will you not also be accepted?” He is saying, Cain you know what to do, you know how to have a dynamic relationship with Me, why will you just not do it? But there is something else going on here. Cain wants to connect with God on his own terms. God tells him, “Sin is crouching at your door. It is about to overtake you. You must master it or it will be master of you.” But Cain refuses and because he severs his relationship with God, he kills his brother. The unifying theme of Scripture is that your relationship with God has a direct correlating relationship with how you treat others. As you connect to God, it changes your value for people. As you connect to God, it changes your relationship to people. As you connect to God, it makes people your highest value, your highest priority. You begin to relate to others not for what they can do for you but what you can actually contribute for good for them.

At the same time the way you treat people is the only true evidence of whether you have actually connected with God. Thus, Scriptures gives us a human history that shows us that as we sever our relationship with God, we begin to sever our relationship with humanity. Where once we lived in community, we are now strangers and aliens and enemies.

Look now at Genesis Ch20, where God is giving Moses the 10 Commandments. When you break down the commandments, the first three are about our relationship to God and the next seven are about our relationship to each other. The theme is consistent. The 10 Commandments tell us that God created us for relationship – relationship with Him and relationship with each other and as we sever our relationship with Him, we sever our relationship with each other but as we connect to Him, we connect to each other. So God begins, you need to worship me and connect to Me properly and then you need to value and connect to people properly. It is not like God sets up the 10 Commandments, this standard, as some unattainable, unreachable goal. If you actually look at the 10 Commandments, it is just the lowest standard of humanity. It is not that it is so high, it is that it is so low and somehow, we continually find a way to crawl under it.

You see, in the first commandment God says just worship Me. You know why? Because it is better for you to worship Me, the God that actually exists, then it is for you to worship a God that does not exist. It is much easier to worship one God, than a thousand others gods that we create. To pray to an uncreated God that actually hears us, then to a God we created that has no ears or eyes or care. God is actually saying, “What are you doing? You are making this so complicated, it’s really very simple. I created you for a relationship with Me. Love me and let me love you.” This is how we were designed.

And then God says, out of your relationship with Me, you must consider how you relate to each other.

Take a look at the 10 Commandments again. Are these really that difficult? “Do not kill.” “Do not steal.” That’s a tough one – you might need a PhD for that one! “Don’t lie to each other.” Or how about, “When your neighbor comes home, can his wife still be his wife? Or his stuff still be his stuff?” Lastly, “Do not covet.” Basically this means, “All these things I told you about, just don’t even think of them.” How hard is this? You know what God is saying? This is the lowest level of what it means to be human and still, you seem to always find a way to crawl under it.

Now just imagine a world where we don’t even live up to the minimum standard of humanity. A world we where we kill each other, we steal from each other, where we lie and slander and deceive each other. A world where we steal from each other but we don’t just steal each other’s stuff, we steal each other’s loves. Nothing is ever enough for us to have, we need to take. Realize now, that this isn’t a hypothetical world; this is the world we created. Seven of the Ten Commandments are God talking to us about how to treat each other.

You would be amazed at how love fulfills the Commandments.

Matthew 22:37-39. What is the most important thing to God? It is so easy – Jesus answers, “The most important thing is this ‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND, and the second is like it...” This is the part where we see that Jesus is great at philosophy but not so good at math. He goes on to say, “… the second is like it, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.’” Jesus’s problem is that he could not separate these two commandments; he understands that the principle theme to the universe is relationship. We live in a moral cosmos, a moral universe. The most important thing to God is loving Him and loving others. They are inextricably linked. If you love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and strength, it will flow over into the second of these greatest commandments. You will love your neighbor as yourself. What Jesus tells us is that you CANNOT love God and NOT love people. But He is also telling us that our relationship with God will dramatically affect how we treat others.

He gives us a darker picture. Matthew 25:31 - 46

31. "But when the Son of Man comes in His glory, and all the angels with Him, then He will sit on His glorious throne. 32. "All the nations will be gathered before Him; and He will separate them from one another, as the shepherd separates the sheep from the goats; 33. and He will put the sheep on His right, and the goats on the left. 34. "Then the King will say to those on His right, `Come, you who are blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. 35. `For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; 36. naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.' 37. "Then the righteous will answer Him, `Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? 38. `And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? 39. `When did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?' 40. "The King will answer and say to them, `Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.'

41. "Then He will also say to those on His left, `Depart from Me, accursed ones, into the eternal fire which has been prepared for the devil and his angels; 42. for I was hungry, and you gave Me nothing to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me nothing to drink; 43. I was a stranger, and you did not invite Me in; naked, and you did not clothe Me; sick, and in prison, and you did not visit Me.' 44. "Then they themselves also will answer, `Lord, when did we see You hungry, or thirsty, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not take care of You?' 45. "Then He will answer them, `Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to Me.' 46. "These will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life."

Again, Jesus is telling us that the central theme of the universe, the core of the mind and heart of God is how we treat each other. He is saying, if you love Me, then love each other. In all actuality, this is the ONLY proof we have that

As Christians, there is something wrong with us when we have such little value for the life of a human being. When we are more against homosexuality then we are for saving the life of those who are hungry. When we are more against divorce then we are for comforting those who are hurting. There is something so terribly wrong with us when we care so little for the injustices of the world, only to lose sight of the value of a human life. Yet in the midst of this all, God speaks profoundly into our morality when it relates to sex.

There is a place I want to take you. A place called Corinth. It might be hard for you to imagine because it is so long ago but just try. Corinth is a major world city. A city filled with wealth. It was known as the artistic capital of the known world. It was a place that became an epicenter of pornography. It was an integration of creativity, immorality and strangely enough spirituality. It was built in the land that worshipped Aphrodite. They built a temple to the goddess of love and in that temple were thousands of prostitutes. They were called sacred prostitutes. With them, they created a very inventive approach to spirituality. They intermingled decadence with sacredness; morality with spirituality. It was great. You could go worship your God while having sex with a stranger.

Paul was in the land for two years. He communicated the message of how God values every human being and how every human being is created in the image and likeness of God. How God so passionately loved humanity that He stepped into human history in the form of Jesus Christ, who lived a perfect and sinless life. And that He was crucified on the cross and raised from the dead. He told them of how God longed for them to know Him and His love. And even in this place people began to be drawn to this message. But something peculiar happened.

They began to embrace this message, yet there was not a lot of social pressure to change their practices, except for one little thing. When you declare that you are in a relationship with God through Jesus Christ, people begin to look at you differently. You are held up to a standard. Those around you will say, “You tell us that you have a relationship with God through Jesus Christ, yet you look and act and talk the same us.” So what ends up happening is a diminishing of the value of who Jesus is because people just were not different. Even when someone does not believe in Christ, they still expect us to be different. It is unfair but it is real.

So Paul begins writing to these followers of Christ and to give them a framework of who they are. In Chapter 3, vs 16, Paul says: “Do you not know that you are a temple of God and that the Spirit of God dwells in you?” This is a whole new idea because they go to temples to offer sacrifices to God and connect to God. But Paul says that it is not about buildings, or brick or stucco or paint. It is about flesh and blood. God has come to dwell in you. You live in Him and He lives in you. That changes everything. So with this, there was a little bit of tension.

Realize that Paul is writing to followers of Christ, not unbelievers. He declares that things are going to change. With this tension, Paul speaks some of his harshest words. He says, “Surely you know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God. Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.” (1 Corinthians 6:9-11) You are not supposed to be the same! You are supposed to be different! He is talking to people saying that I know this is not a popular position. You are going to be the oppressed minority, yet you still must live up to this standard!

He goes on to say that he is allowed to do all things but not all things are good for him to do (v12). He is saying that everything is permissible but not everything is beneficial! You can eat that baby spinach but when you die of diarrhea, don’t get ticked off at God.

I am allowed to do all things but not all things are good for me. I am allowed to do all things but I will not let anything make me its slave. So what we have to ask ourselves is, “Am I slave to my cravings and desires and lusts and passions or am I their master?” He goes on to say, “Food is for the stomach and the stomach is for food, but God will do away with both of them. Yet the body is not for immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord is for the body.” (v13)

This is where he says that what you do between the sheets really matters. In verse 15 he begins to say, “Surely you know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take away the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? May it never be! Or do you not know that the one who joins himself to a prostitute is one body with her? For He says, "THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH." But the one who joins himself to the Lord is one spirit with Him.” (v15-17) What he is saying is that, “Don’t you understand that once you enter into a relationship with God, whatever you do, you bring God into? And everything you experience you bring into God’s experience with you? You are the most sacred of God’s creation. You ARE the temple of God’s spirit.”

He goes on, “Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.” (v18-20) You are not your own. You are God’s temple and He bought you with a price.

You may want to think of yourself as just an animal but the Scriptures won’t allow me to view you in such a way. You see, God looks at you and declares you to be created in His image and likeness. He declares that you are His ultimate creation. He declares that you are part of a moral universe and that you are to be the most beautiful expression of who He is. He created you for love. He created you for relationship. How we relate to each other matters to God.

Paul connects the dots for us with Romans, ch 1. Many historians believe that Paul wrote Romans while in Corinth watching the end game of our corruption. Our moving from love to consumption. That we become basically sexual cannibals, consuming one another. He begins in vs 21, “21. For even though they knew God, they did not honor Him as God or give thanks, but they became futile in their speculations, and their foolish heart was darkened. 22. Professing to be wise, they became fools, 23. and exchanged the glory of the incorruptible God for an image in the form of corruptible man and of birds and four-footed animals and crawling creatures. 24. Therefore God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, so that their bodies would be dishonored among them. 25. For they exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever.” (Romans 1:21-25) God will let you choose the life you choose. Here they traded the truth of God for a lie. Sometimes a lie serves us better. What we see is that what we worship, shapes who we become.

They worshipped and served what had been created, rather than the One who created. Because they did this, God left them to their own degrading desires and let them do the shameful things they wanted to do. “26. For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural, 27. and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error.” What God is saying is, “If you eat the crap, it will destroy you.” Do not blame God when you make the choices that leave your soul shattered.

He goes on, “28. And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper, 29. being filled with all unrighteousness, wickedness, greed, evil; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, malice; they are gossips, 30. slanderers, haters of God, insolent, arrogant, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, 31. without understanding, untrustworthy, unloving, unmerciful; 32. and although they know the ordinance of God, that those who practice such things are worthy of death, they not only do the same, but also give hearty approval to those who practice them.”

God gives us such a severe warning because God counts nothing more important than how we treat another human being. It is amazing how many of us have given up on love.